Heather Sanders

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September 2007



Do you know your own love language?

Written by , Posted in Everything Else, Kids and Parenting

Five Love Languages of Children

Well, well, well…I sure opened a can of worms on Tuesday, didn’t I? Can I just say right off that I am THANKFUL for all of y’all? No seriously, that sounds all syrupy and silly, but I am. I look forward to reading your comments, even when I get the sneaky suspicion you’re gonna fry me up and serve me with tarter sauce. Y’all are just pretty stinkin’ awesome.

Today, I’m marching to the opposite spectrum because I want to talk about love. Most specifically, how we show our love and how we give love. As I watch my three kiddos grow up, I see how very different they give and receive love. One of them needs a lot of touch, but not a lot of quality time. The other needs tons of touch and quality time, but isn’t really big on getting gifts and doesn’t need a lot of affirmation. One of them seems to change daily, but quality time and affirmation are pretty significant constants.

Jeff and I went through the The Five Love Languages of Children course before Meredith was born. Although that particular course centered around learning the love languages of your children, it applies pretty universally. We learned a lot about each other’s love languages through that course – at least, we “read” about each other … I’m not too sure that we digested it and applied it with the regularity we could have through the years. Marriage – always a learning and growing experience, no?

At any rate, I found this Love Language Quiz online. It is rather short, but a “quickie” to get you thinking about how you receive love. In other words, what REALLY makes you feel loved.

When I first took a significantly longer test than this and discovered my love languages, I felt like a typical only child, but I’ve grown to understand that I can’t view it that way. It isn’t that I decided this is how I want to receive love, but rather – this is WHO I AM and HOW I RECEIVE the feeling of being loved.

My love languages, when met, do the trick and I feel all warm and gooey inside.

So what are my primary love languages? Receiving Gifts/Words of Affirmation tie and Physical Touch is a very close second.

And yours? What are yours?

How does it match up with your spouse? If you flip mine upside down and switch Physical Touch with Quality Time I bet I’d have Jeff’s; of course, I can’t be certain until he takes the test too.

Heather Sanders


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